- ii justt needd somee timee. *

i want to dance beside a frozen lake :: where the snowflakes gently fall from the sky :: the hair swaying in the chilly wind :: as the still moments of the winter everning :: is enlightened by me ::

My Contradictions.

- SEVENTEEN yet EIGHTEEN.
- SOPHISTICATED yet SIMPLE.
- WILD yet TAME.
- CRAZY yet NORMAL.
- BITCHY yet KIND.
- SLUTTISH yet DEMURE.
- FRANK yet SHY.
- CHILDISH yet MATURE.
- DEVILISH yet ANGELIC.
- NARCISSISTIC yet SELFLESS.
- CONFUSED yet SURE.
- FICKLE yet CONSISTENT.
- SELFISH yet GIVING.
- FIERCE yet GENTLE.
- ANNOYING yet LOVABLE.
- HEARTLESS yet SENTIMENTAL.
- SCHEMING yet NAIVE.
- LAZY yet HARDWORKING.
- RETARDED yet INTELLIGENT.
- IGNORANT yet KNOWLEDGEABLE.
- UNFEELING yet CARING.
- SLOPPY yet TIDY.
- IMAGINATIVE yet REALISTIC.
- PESSIMISTIC yet OPTIMISTIC.
- INTROVERTED yet EXTROVERTED.

My Loves.

- ME.MYSELF.I.
- MONEY.
- COMPUTER.
- HAND PHONE.
- CAMERA.
- CHILDREN.
- MIRRORS.
- MAKE UP.
- BITCHING.
- GOSSIPING.
- CRITICIZING.
- SLACKING.

My Hates.

- BEING BROKE.
- BEING SCOLDED.
- BEING BACKSTABBED.
- EMPTY VESSELS.
- HYPOCRITES.
- REPEAT OFFENDERS.
- COMPUTER BREAKDOWN.

My Tagboard.

My Archives.

March 2005

April 2005

May 2005

June 2005

July 2005

August 2005

September 2005

October 2005

November 2005

December 2005

January 2006

February 2006

March 2006

April 2006

May 2006

June 2006

July 2006

August 2006

September 2006

My Links.

-=| Alvin. |=-

-=| Amanda. |=-

-=| Blogger. |=-

-=| Brenda. |=-

-=| Chuan Ru. |=-

-=| Claudia. |=-

-=| Darren. |=-

-=| Desmond. |=-

-=| Eleanna. |=-

-=| Eugene. |=-

-=| Fatin. |=-

-=| Fiona. |=-

-=| Gabriel. |=-

-=| Hazwan. |=-

-=| Huang Zhi. |=-

-=| Jasmine. |=-

-=| Jessica. |=-

-=| Jiaxin. |=-

-=| Jieying. |=-

-=| Joni. |=-

-=| Joyee. |=-

-=| Kenneth. |=-

-=| Phyllis. |=-

-=| Rhoda. |=-

-=| Rosalind. |=-

-=| Saky. |=-

-=| Shahidatul. |=-

-=| Siti Adawiyah. |=-

-=| Steph. |=-

-=| Steven. |=-

-=| Wan Juan. |=-

-=| Weng Lum. |=-

-=| Xia Xue. |=-

-=| Yvonne. |=-

I Love You.

We never really noticed each other.
Or at least I never noticed you.
But now you are my fantasy.
My wonderful dream come true.

Your eyes met mine.
And mine met yours.
The story of Sleeping Beauty.
Riding on a horse.

Often I think of you.
And wonder if you think of me.
I just want to be there with you.
Through times of thick and thin.

Many a time I neglected you.
But you never seem to mind.
You're one in a million.
Once in a lifetime.

When you smile.
It's the greatest prize.
I'm in heaven.
I'm in paradise.

When I close my eyes.
I see your face.
The touch of your hands.
And the way you embrace.

If I'm in trouble.
All I need to do is call.
Cause I know you'll be there for me.
I know you'll catch me if I fall.

You shine like a lighthouse.
And you showed me the light.
And then I see that life.
Is not only black and white.

I believe in love.
The everlasting kind.
But true love and lust.
Are separated by a mere thin line.

I love you for who you are.
For everything you say.
And no matter what happens.
You will never be replaced.

So now you know my feelings for you.
Is not like eating jam and toast.
Our fairytale is full of love.
It's called Amor Infinitus.

|ll|ll|l||ll||ll|l|ll|
c0pyyrighttedd ; [-gabrielle-]

click here to go to my new blog skin!!

Sunday, March 12, 2006

sorry for the delay in entries.

but i was rather upset for the past few nights.as i've been saying,i'm a late blogger.and recently my "depression" tingy has come back to haunt me.i really dont lyk it but it just settles down on me when the late hours of the night falls.

it has been lyk tt since i was sec3 but apparently it stopped during my sec4 and after my olvls.but now its back n i duno who to tok to.in the past at least i had mr virabak(?) to rant to even though i hate his advises.

seems tt i'm much much happier in the day.but the happier i am,the sadder i will be at night.its lyk a never ending cycle.i once told poh hwee tt if there r no sad moments,den happy moments will just be moments.

i cant keep it in anymore or i will just go crazy.i dont noe how long i can pretend to be happy anymore.i'm not.for the past few nights i cant even betray my heart n type the word "happy".tt's y i'm taking this risk n bloggin in the afternoon.

i'm sorry if i sound emo or i bring ur moods down but i cant hide it anymore.i'm suffering.

its not a one day affair tt made me lyk this.to those who noe me personally,i'm not lyk tt.u all should noe tt i'm pretty good at hiding my depression.but its just blowing up.and after wad i heard ytd i just broke down at night.i cried myself to sleep.

nonetheless,this blog will never have his name.never had,never will.its not fendy and i'm not gona say who.HE is the devil who made me who i am today.he is the devil who participated in bringing me to this world.he is the devil.

he nutured the hate i had for men.and now he is bringing it all back.he is the one who treated me worse den a mere street dog.i will never forgive nor forget.i hate him.no doubt i didnt see him,but the sound of his name boils my blood.

so what if his is flowing in mine?den all the more i shouldnt be treated how i was.i was so young.a living human being.but i was inferior to a puppy.why?am i so insignificant just because i'm female?am i worse off den street animals?

wad did i do to deserve all that?

this hate.all the hate.will never be appleased.

wad did i do to get all that?please,i dont understand.i was just a normal baby.but y is my childhood so different?mayb mine is not the worst case,but for me to grow to become wad i am,took alot.

i hope my "brother" will be better off.i hate the fact he is my half "brother".i dont want to admit it.but i guess i have to.though this will probably be the only tyme u see me mention tt i do have a half blood brother.

but recently tt's not the only ting bothering me.i've been considering abt the SAF scheme.the airforce called to say my course was not revelant n turned me down.i was not tt enthu abt it in the 1st place so i let it go.

i called up the navy n they said the same ting.so i asked if they can help me appeal out.they said it can be done and they will get the relevant ppl to get back to me.i had a tok with my parents ytd n they strongly encourage me to take it up.

the ting is i cant bear to leave LSCT when i haven even explored the whole ting.n i mean LSCT sounds so nice.so "high up" cuz its a damn science faculty.sianz.but anw,IF in the case i do appeal out,i'll probably go to the computing n network technology course.

i tink its at sp leh.haven really go check out but if it is,den mayb i'll choose a course in np.see 1st.mayb i'll change my mind tmr?who knows.

ok,so here r afew updates.we(jess,fendy,william n i) didnt go to escape tt day.cuz poh hwee didnt come along so jess decided not to go.went to bishan j8 and then to marine square where i bought a new top and yet another pair of earings.

i also found a new earring rack. =D i am so happy now and cant wait for it to come.hehehehehehes.so anw,here r afew pics from long tyme ago.cuz fendy just sent them to me thru msn the other day.

taken on the day i pontanged my job.hahahas.ranaway cuz i had mens cramps.so drank hot milo at PS.

what am i looking at?

its joyce's MUDDY MUD PIE!!!(doesnt look appealing to eat huhs?)

her pie was already so chocolately,but she wanted more chocolate sauce n chips.omfg. she can really eat chocolate!!

but nonetheless,she's still my SOGUI SHIFU JOYCE TAN!! hehes.i went over to acc her to eat dinner b4 her work tt day.she is so cute!! lalalalas.

tt's me on the MRT to changi to pick daddy up.i look so blur.

so tt's all for today.might update tmr IF the stupid ting dun haunt me. =D

Permalink.

IDreamtOfYouAt.

3:01 PM

[-THE.love*--] flows from your heart